Reflections In A Mirror (Genderbend AU, locked to creatormundi)

[yourbrainasplode]

Ruvik was a good name. She had decided that long ago. It was a rejection of everything her mother had wanted from her. The elegance. The frills. Nothing but window dressing. The same kind of vapid selfishness that would make her a perfect bride to one of Cedar Hill's prominent mouthpieces. A pretty trophy for the mantlepiece. An incubator for more slaves to fuel the cult machine.

The fire had killed Lawrence. Took her face from her. It was her mother who tried to rob her of her life. Jimenez who robbed her of her work and her body. If only she had kept her mother around to see. There was elegance in blood. Beauty in a mind laid bare. She was a sculptor, the human brain her medium. And she would continue her work. They could not keep her here. Just as her mother could not keep her in the basement.

...Someone was here.

Not Leslie. Not the two detectives, or the lone agent from the Organization. A man. He felt so familiar. Not like a friend. Not in the sense of one individual knowing another, but the familiarity of a fitting glove, or a tailored dress.

The sense one had when they were completely at ease with themselves. What was this? Some new symptom of her schizophrenia? Something triggered by her seizures? Her attention was focused on the older detective, a woman named Sabrina, but this new oddity had her perplexed. Not to mention curious. She turned her focus away from the detective's presence, shifting her consciousness to study the new anomaly. Not manifesting her avatars just yet. All she wanted was a glimpse.

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[creatormundi]

Pain.

It was uncanny how an organ that could not feel any could remember exactly what it was and how it felt so vividly.

At least he was still in the STEM. Where else could he be, really. But the STEM felt... different. What had they done to his pet project?! He could feel them inside, that girl from the Organization, and the detectives... Leslie... not quite the same.

And another.

Also not quite the same. But still full of hate, and rage, and mind shards not quite fitting together, and fire.

"... Sister?"

[yourbrainasplode]

A single word spoken and she freezes. Her first thought is of Lawrence. But no, here he is nothing but a bad memory, a reminder of her guilt and torment. The monstrous form he took wasn't capable of anything but snarls and screams. Then, tentatively, careful not to damage the other personality, she made the connection.

Her caution wasn't needed in the first place. She could never damage this man any more than searching one's own memory could. Everything was exactly the same, save for him being a man. Their date of birth. The date of the "accident". Every major event the same. He was her. She was him.

She recoiled from his mind at the realization. A fully synchronized intruder. It had to be. No. The others had no faces. They weren't capable of probing her mind.

But this was impossible. It had to be. Lawrence was her only brother. She would have known if...

Lawrence. Laura.

She manifested behind him, staring at the same stained lab coat she herself was wearing. She was still cautious. What was this? Some hallucination? A trick of her own damaged mind? A manifestation of dissociative identity disorder?

"How?" she asked quietly. "How is any of this possible?"

[creatormundi]

Ruvik visibly recoiled from the apparition as soon as she appeared, still shaken by the discoveries he was making.

He was her. She was him.

What sort of mad science...?

"That..." he straightened. Were dissociative identities supposed to have independent thoughts like she seemed to? "Is not the hypothesis I set out to explore."

These numbskulls at Moebius better not be fucking with the STEM again.

[yourbrainasplode]

Moebius could be responsible, it was true. But her own hypothesis went beyond their capabilities. If some sort of quantum malfunction was involved...if multiverse theory were correct, they could have become entangled, two minds in the same brain.

"No one can sequence memories, or make recordings. They know the general sequence of events. Only we would know the specifics."

She cast him a glance. "Of course, some slight differences are expected."

It was intriguing, she had to admit. Herself as a man. Who could say they had met their animus personality face to face? "Or for all we know the STEM is destabilizing. All the more reason to secure the host."

[creatormundi]

Ruvik eyed his... female self? anima? mental construct? suspiciously. He was considering the same hypothesis as her, though he did not know. But this seemed rather removed from reality. It could be a Moebius ploy to get him out of the system. But even then... they weren't that adept at manipulating his pride and joy.

"The host may only be able to sustain one of us, if the STEM is destabilizing. That is. If you are not a figment of my own unstable self, of course."

[yourbrainasplode]

She smiled. "If I am a figment, I am a very lucid one. No matter. I am very close."

The wall next to them peeled away like old paint, revealing a long one-way glass. Leslie stood motionless in a hall, trembling, her long white braid falling over her shoulder as she wrapped her arms around herself for reassurance.

"Though you know her to be a boy instead, don't you."

[creatormundi]

Ruvik acknowledged with a small movement of the head, staring intently at this Leslie, lips parted. Long colourless hair, scared eyes framed by long lashes, small breasts, small hips, and of course that beautiful mind inside of the flesh wrapper, so cozy, so welcoming, so pliable.

"She's magnificent," Ruvik finally whispered in admiration.

[yourbrainasplode]

"She is." She watched the timid girl as she went on, clinging to a wall in the darkness, a tiny white ghost, a delicate moth. "She will no longer have to fear anyone. Doctors. Mean-spirited children. Her father."

Ruvik turned her gaze to her double. "I am to be a permanent guest. The least I can do is care for the main resident's well-being. But before I can do that..."

She shifted their surroundings. A strong pulse, a collapse of the hall they were in, and the mind-construct STEM chamber materialized around them. Beneath their feet, through the glass, were those connected to her mind. Castellanos, Oda, Leslie... all women. The agent, Kidman, a young man.

Ruvik went to one of the terminals, inspecting the feeds. "Somehow our signals have been crossed. We should find out how, and why. But it is best we find a way to untangle our minds. We don't know what might happen if we stay this way."

[creatormundi]

"At the very least," Ruvik said as he looked at the captives of the STEM, "I doubt even Leslie can house both of us."

Not that he would have minded being housed in this Leslie's body. The aura of vulnerability and powerlessness she projected would have been perfect bait, like a delicate, deadly carnivorous plant. But she was not his to possess.

As he walked to a terminal next to his female self, he paused just a fraction to look at Castellanos. He wondered if she ached, if she screamed, if she fought like his Castellanos did. Wondered how her pretty face looked when twisted in pain and rage. Wondered how the colour of her blood would run against her skin as her mind shattered. But she, too, was not his to play with.

"Hm." He studied the various terminals with great attention. Vitals, mind sync, time, stress levels, even, in an indirect way, mental health, everything on display for them to study.

It was only when he checked the terminals that only existed in his mind and not on the outside that he noticed something. "Ruvik."

That sounded so weird.

"The stability of my... our manor is inverted," he said, looking at a fluctuating bar graph. Columns that should be up were hanging down, and columns that should be down were stretching upward. "Unless these numbers fall within expectations for you."

[yourbrainasplode]

She looked up from her monitor to glance at his. "Perfectly normal, for me." Her smile was bitter, and she turned away again. "I can imagine that your aggressor was your father? Rather than your mother?"

She trailed a hand over the instruments as she walked back to the central chamber. There she stared down at Castellanos. Another mother. A far better one than her own. Ruvik read the reports. The detective had to be held back to keep her from running into the building where her daughter had burned alive. That was what a real mother would do.

"My mother was a heartless, frozen shrew. Even my father cowered from her."

[creatormundi]

"My mother was no less a culprit than my father was," Ruvik spat angrily, glancing at the terminals one last time as he followed his counterpart, stopping before Castelllanos' body as well. "Her caring was superficial and entire built around appearances."

Completely unlike Sebastian. Or this Castellanos, he was sure. Doting parents who would put their lives on the line for their children. Who cared so much it hurt them. Had Sebastian's child survived the fire, Ruvik was certain the detective would not have locked it in a basement to be forgotten like a despicable thing.

Castelllanos looked like she was sleeping. Only Ruvik and himself understood the true beauty of her unravelling mind.

"Is yours as pleasurable to torment as mine?"

[yourbrainasplode]

"He too was complicit. If only for his cowardice."

Ruvik watched him as he stared at the woman. She couldn't help a brief spike of anger. Irrational, but there all the same. "I prefer 'testing'. It's a pity she isn't compatible. She is strong. Capable. Her mind is far more resistant than the others."

[creatormundi]

Ruvik nodded in agreement, already thinking up ways to try and break the Castellanos woman, even if, logically, her Ruvik must have tried them. "Same for mine..." He looked away and back at his counterpart. "Unfortunately, that does not untangle our minds, or explain my presence at your side. Not that it is unpleasant, but theoretical physics is not quite our strong suit."

[yourbrainasplode]

"Agreed. Although there may be a hint of a pattern. Something that we might be able to use."

Back to the monitors, looking at the brainwave readings. "Here. See this curve? It began the same time I sensed your presence. A bit before, actually. They are synched now, but in time, who knows. We might drift apart on our own."

[creatormundi]

"I see," he said, studying the monitor over her shoulder. "I must admit, I cannot see an event that could have triggered our meeting..." He shuddered violently, grabbing a hold of his own arm. Unless being set on fire again by Castellanos... no. No. Stop thinking about it.

[yourbrainasplode]

She sensed his fear, keen and sharp like a knife to her brain. She wouldn't dig into his mind. It didn't feel...right. But she didn't need to. Only one thing could produce a similar fear in her.

Ruvik turned and grasped his arm as well, slender fingers digging in so he could feel. An anchor. A reminder that he was here and now, not in the past.

"You're safe," she said firmly. "There is no fire. Not here. We are in control here."

[creatormundi]

Ruvik exhaled loudly, hands still shaking despite her grip on his arm. "Ah... we... we are." He coughed a bit, trying to steady his breathing despite the panic. Even if she was him, tohave someone witness his weakness made him want to hide, but also destroy things. But if he destroyed anything here, it might, no, will be dangerous for their continued existence.

[yourbrainasplode]

She watched him carefully, made sure he was steady enough on his own. A smile made its way into her scarred lips. "Go have fun with them. Just don't kill them. Even Castellanos has her purpose."

Ruvik closed her eyes, scanning her mind for signs of the detective. "She is within the memory of the city. Near the factory."